A bright and glorious day this morrow brings,
Wethinks We shalt engage in a small journey.
To Dover shalt We ride, and ye shalt see
A great, majestic view as grand as We.
We entreat ye join us, Rex, McMaster,
Porter and dear Shulkin, please come, too.
Cohen, and Dowd and Hope, please follow anon,
Thy assistance shalt We also need.
As members of Our honored, noble court,
Ye shouldst become accustomed to great heights.
(Aside to Cohen) The rocks and sand below shalt soon become
accustomed, just the same, to all of them.
McMaster, Rex. Hasten thy slothsome gate.
Draw near, Hope, Cohen and Dowd. The cliffs approach.
A long, steep ride, it is, but what a view!
Admire this sight, We bid, and comprehend,
That We are noble masters of all ye see.
Or nearly all, for when the day is clear,
A well-sighted man can see Russia from here.
If’t please thee, Rex, step up to the cliff’s grand edge,
McMaster, thou, as well. Take my place, here.
Porter, Shulkin, step thee up anon.
Is this not a sight for only gods?
(Aside to Dowd) The gods o’the lowlands have their sights on them.
(To Rex) Have a closer look, I know thine eyes
Are not what they once were in younger times.
(Shoves Rex off the cliff)
McMaster, thou as well, shouldst cast thy gaze,
To where thy friend now stumbles in the haze.
(Shoves McMaster)
O dear. Hath they fallen? Someone help!
Porter, wilt thou help them? Go at once. (Shoves Porter)
Shulkin, please assist him. Teamwork, Sirs! (Shoves Shulkin)
We’d go, too, save for Our famed bone spurs.
Exeunt Rex, McMaster, Porter, Shulkin
Watch them, Cohen, like Icarus, they rise,
As high as gods, then fall, like common mortals,
into the sea. We love an execution
in the morning, dost thou not, dear Hope?
As We have said before, We could do this
Amid The Royal Exchange and be absolved.
Tell Us, Dowd, Wouldst thou not counsel it?
And Cohen couldst thou construe ‘twas good for business.
Hope, wilt thou assist in the pronouncement?
Our court shalt now be leaner than before.
(Cohen jumps off the cliff)
Wait! Ho! What was that!
Didst thou see him fly, and on his own?
(Dowd jumps off.) What! Dowd?
And didst thou see that, Hope? How Cohen just jumped
right off and Dowd did follow him anon?
(Hope jumps) What? Why jumpest thou? What sense is this?
Thou were not cast from Our noble court.
The icy shores of Dover, dost thou find,
More pleasing than thy ministry assigned?
Exeunt Dowd, Cohen, Hope
No matter.
More noblemen desire Our high court,
Than rocks bestrew the sandy shores below.
Like Lincoln. Finest squire of any time.
And Frederick Douglass, Our old friend. We’ve heard
Good things about this famous Moor of late.
These noble lords shalt help rebuild Our court.
Just a few more crocodiles to hire,
And belike We’ll have the swamp that we desire.
Right, Lincoln?
…
What sayest thou? Business interests? We see.
Well, We still retain Our favorite Moor.
Right, Frederick?
…
Frederick?